by Rich Green, Daily Vidette Columnist
I felt like doing something just a little different for this column. I am basically doing a running diary from start to finish (Ala Bill Simmons).
I really wish Fox would stop hosting the World Series. Nothing makes baseball worse than having to listen to Joe Buck and Tim McCarver for three-and-a-half hours.
Speaking of bad decisions, why does Fox insist on showing close-ups of Charlie Manuel? Having to see his face is like never waking up from a bad dream.
Here we go, two grizzled vets going head to head in the playoffs once again. Andy Pettitte looks focused as always and Pedro Martinez looks like he could erupt at any moment.
First Inning: Chase Utley just came up with Shane Victorino on base. I would hope they consider walking him. If the Phillies lose tonight, can Utley still win the MVP?
Utley double play…It might be the Yankees night.
So, here comes Pedro. Looking ready and wait, is he having a conference on the mound with his catcher after the first pitch? Oh, this is not good.
Bottom of the second: Pedro just walked A-Rod and my cat Dragon just jumped in front of the TV as Matsui hit a rocket foul. Are there laws against drowning cats?
7:33: GODZILLA! Matsui just homered and saved my cat’s life. 2-0 Evil Empire.
7:45 Carlos Ruiz just hit a triple? Oh man.
7:46 Rollins hit a sac fly to right, 2-1 Evil Empire.
Pettitte better start getting these pitches down or the Phillies are going to start feasting. Get that sinker going, Andy. I know you have it in you.
7:57: Just got another close-up of Charlie Manuel. Man he reminds me of a creepy old substitute teacher I had in junior high.
8:00: Pedro just plunked Teixeira. He is just ready to implode.
8:06: Godzilla the sequel. Bases loaded single, Yankees up 4-1. Matsui officially owns Martinez and scored himself a fat contract this offseason.
8:15: It’s great that Joe Girardi in no way looks like Billy Martin. Don’t tell George Steinbrenner.
8:27: Who would have thought that Corn Flakes with a touch of honey was good baseball food? Who needs chicken wings?
8:45: Martinez and his 86 mph fastball have finally exited the game. Now that the Yanks have gotten to the Phillies’ bullpen lets see if they can smell blood in the water…Oh, Jeter just doubled, hmmmm…
8:48: Big Tex just roped a single to center. 5-1. This game is over. Is it coincidence that Chad Durbin looks like Mitch Williams?
8:51: Everyone in my home town of LaSalle-Peru is currently going nuts as the prodigal son J.A. Happ has made it to the mound of the World Series. From St. Bede to the Bronx. Think he remembers the time he schooled me at a basketball camp in South Beloit?
8:57: Just as I finish singing Happ’s praises, Godzilla III just hit theatres. He is now 3-for-3 with 6 RBIs. 7-1 Yankees.
9:00: Oh, no. I forgot the Len Bias Documentary was coming on. I wish I had the dual tuner DVR. Man, I miss my house in La Salle.
9:10: I think me checking my facebook has just resulted in bad ju-ju for the Yankees. Ryan Howard’s non strikeout just made the game 7-3.
9:14: An Ibanez double just chased Pettitte out of the game after 5 2/3 innings. It’s time for the Joba rules.
9:24: I wonder if the Yankees are going to redeem themselves in the locker room when it comes to the after party? Are Diddy or Jay-Z coming? Are they busting Jim Leyritz out of jail?
9:37: This game just hit the wall. I find myself looking through eBay trying to find old school baseball games for Nintendo.
9:42: Carlos Ruiz is making his bid to win the Pat Borders award for best playoff catcher since Pat Borders.
9:54 Damaso Marte just did the impossible. He struck out Utley with two men on base. Yankees are six outs away.
10:14: Ryan Howard just struck out for the millionth time this postseason. Five more outs to go.
10:18: Mariano Rivera just struck out Jayson Werth. I have never felt more confident about anything in my whole life. I would feel worse about my chances to get out off my couch and go to the bathroom.
10:25: Three outs to go.
10:41: Why does Matt Stairs still have a job? My friend Stokes is right by calling him a professional softball player. One out.
10:46: J-Roll flys out deep to right. Two outs.
10:50: Yankees win! Theeeeeeeeeee Yankees win!! Everything is now right in the universe! Please don’t let me down celebration!